Meanehwæl, baccat meaddehæle, monstær lurccen;
Fulle few too many drincce, hie luccen for fyht.
Ðen Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,
Æsccen æwful jeork to steop outsyd. Þhud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! Ðe bigge gye
Eallum his bon brak, byt his nose offe;
Wicced Godsylla wæld on his asse.
Monstær moppe fleor wyþ eallum men in hælle.
Beowulf in bacceroome fonecall bamaccen wæs;
Hearen sond of ruccus sæd, "Hwæt ðe helle?"
Graben sheold strang ond swich-blæd scharp
Stond feorth to fyht ðe grimlic foe. "Me," Godsylla sæd, "mac ðe minsemete."
Heoro cwyc geten heold wiþ fæmed half-nelson
Ond flyng him lic frisbe bac to fen
Beowulf belly up to meaddehæle bar,
Sæd, "Ne foe beaten mie færsom cung-fu."
Eorderen cocca-cohla yce-coeld, ðe reol þyng.
Translated: Beowulf and Godzilla
Meanwhile, back at mead-hall, the monster lurked
Full from too many drinks, he looked for a fight
Then Hreoreror, son of Hrowororth,
Asked the awful jerk to step aside. Thud, Bash, Crash, Boom!
The big guy
All his bones broke, his nose bit off;
Wicked Godzilla wailed on his ass
The monster mopped the floor with all of the men in the hall
Beowulf in the backroom made a phone call back home
Hearing sounds of ruckus he said, "what the hell?"
Grabbing his strong shield and sharp switch blade
He stood forth to fight the grim foe
"Me," Godzilla said, "make the mince-meet."
The hero quickly got held in the famed half-nelson
And was flown like a Frisbee back and forth
Beowulf belly up at the mead-hall's bar.
Said, "No foe has beaten my fearsome kung-fu."
He ordered an ice cold
Coca-cola, the real thing.
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